When did rest become something we have to earn?

We’ve all been through times of extreme stress and overload, when balance was impossible to achieve. But nowadays, it often feels like that’s always the case. We’re living in busy times with lots of priorities, lots of complexities and lots of costs. And for many of us, we’re living in a cycle of work-recover-repeat. You probably know what we’re talking about: having your weekdays consumed by work, family routine or life admin. Stuff that has to be done, but doesn’t fuel you, leaving you feeling like you just have to get through it. Only to collapse into the weekend, a precious two days that become recovery instead of living. Time spent getting the house in order, finishing up projects, taking care of the admin that didn’t get done during the week, and setting up for the next week. No rest, just reset. This cycle leaves us all with the feeling of being constantly ‘on’ without reprieve, and it’s slowly draining us.

Why rest feels so hard right now

Taking breaks is critical for our physical, mental and emotional health, but a number of factors have made it harder for us to justify rest. Of course, the complexity of life is one such factor. Our natural drive to evolve as humans has made us as individuals, and as a society, push for more and greater achievements. Hustle culture has given people opportunities, but it’s also set expectations that spare time needs to be used for productivity. When paired with the hyperconnectivity of social media, which gives us nonstop insider access into the lifestyles of the rich and the famous (or the internet famous), it’s easy to feel left behind or as if you’re missing out. But, as they say, comparison is the thief of joy, and constantly scrolling through fast-paced content spikes our dopamine levels, which actually lowers our brain's tolerance for slower, everyday tasks and hobbies - and sleep.

There’s also the financial factor. For most people, wages haven't kept pace with the skyrocketing costs of essentials like housing, groceries, and healthcare. The traditional ‘work hard and you’ll succeed’ roadmap is no longer leading to success. The promise has been broken. When putting in 40+ hours a week no longer guarantees the ability to comfortably afford a home or save for the future, it breeds deep burnout and hopelessness, and it destroys the illusion of meritocracy. All of this combined has left people with not just physical tiredness, but emotional exhaustion - and feelings of guilt around slowing down.

Rest isn’t the same as restoration

We often associate ‘rest’ with the cessation of activity. Not working, not thinking, not moving, not exerting ourselves - mentally, emotionally or physically. But rest isn’t restoration. Here’s a helpful image: If your phone’s battery is low, simply giving it a rest - turning it off, shutting down all your apps or leaving it idle on the table - doesn’t also recharge its battery. In order to recharge it, we can’t just take away activity, we have to actually give it energy. Our bodies are the same. Restoration of energy and enthusiasm is actually an active process, one that requires intention and some purposeful effort.

While rest is not the same thing as restoration, restoration does take rest. You need time and intention to repair fatigue and rebuild energy levels, but truly recharging and recovering often also involves connection, play, movement, creativity, and presence. I think more and more of us are starting to see that scrolling isn’t rest. And though it may be for some, isolation isn’t always restorative for everyone.

Self-care may be the obvious answer for emotional, mental and even physical recovery, but what isn’t always obvious is what that looks like for you. That’s why rest isn’t the same as restoration - because truly restorative time requires intentional effort into both understanding and engaging in the activities that restore you physically, emotionally and mentally.

The workplace connection

With all the pressures of the world manifesting in the workplace, it’s no wonder people are feeling overwhelmed. While there are a number of practices and protections that exist to support rest, recovery and restoration - like protected vacation time - many organizations still have a long way to go, because burnout isn’t solved by a vacation. Though holidays can be restful, and may help with some recovery, they’re not always restorative. Not if you have to work twice as hard before and after your time off to make up for time and effort ‘lost’. This isn’t restoration, it’s a bandaid between a cut and a bruise.

Truly supportive workplaces make balance more possible, all year round, whether you have holiday available or not. Benefits can help employees find better balance and opportunities for rest, but culture matters too, maybe more. Flexibility around time and tasks, clarity around expectations, boundaries between work and life, and psychological safety are critical to allow employees to truly rest, recover and restore. 

Small ways to reclaim balance

Though you may not be able to heavily influence your workplace culture, there are some things you can do to help reclaim balance in your life. Take breaks before you reach burnout. That includes using your vacation time. Did you know that 45% of Canadians don’t take their full allotment of vacation days each year? This is despite the fact that more than half of all Canadians feel ‘vacation deprived.’

Protecting your time outside of work is another way to reclaim balance. When you clock out at the end of your work day, whatever that looks like for you, truly switch off. Don’t take calls or answer emails or jump back on your computer or stick around. Walk out the door (metaphorically perhaps, if you work from home) and do something different. Having a clear switching routine that helps signal to your body that you’re no longer working and now is time for rest and relaxation could be helpful.

Make sure you’re actually using the benefits and support that are available to you. Do you have a health spending account that you could use on a gym membership or a meditation app? Do you have volunteer days that you could use to give back? Are there resources available to help you find groups of like-minded people? Can your EAP support you in kicking any bad habits you’ve developed in an attempt to unwind?

Everyone’s approach to rest and resilience is different. In fact, what some might find helpful in recovery, others would find stressful. Exercise is a great example of this: some people might find themselves fully recharged after hiking up a mountain, while others would be left overwhelmed just at the very thought of it. For some, watching tv shows they find funny would stimulate a sense of relaxation; for others, they’d find this time wasted, not spent resting. Regardless of what triggers a sense of restoration for you, some of the most important time spent is that which helps you discover the very things that help you recover and reclaim balance in your life. 

Life shouldn’t only happen in the gaps between work. Employees deserve support systems that help them stay well - not just recover enough to keep going - but creating real life moments of rest and recovery requires personal intention too.